“But maybe this thing was a masterpiece ‘til you tore it all up.”

The last six months, all I remember were beautiful things about us but then one day you asked for time and that was the exact day you broke my heart. You said you needed time to think things out, you were confused and there’s no other girl involved. You did not call; you left me hanging. I became miserable and decided to end things between us; I got no reply. I pleaded hard to put things back between us but you wanted me to stay away from you; that’s how you made me feel.

Two weeks after our official break up you went out with this new girl. Like wow, why is it so easy for you to leave and replace me when all I did is love you faithfully for a long time? Oh I remember, there’s this girl who liked my wall post ‘:)’ the night before I decided to end things. She is the same girl that you went out with, you did exact the same thing to her; the cupcakes and the swimming thing and now she’s your girlfriend for almost two months now I think. Boo yah! Just so you know, The 3-month rule just ended today. Oh I guess in every rule there is an exemption huh.

I feel so betrayed and cheated. Go call me bitter but now tell me, how can you expect me, my friends and my loved ones to look at you the same way? And oh you think I’m making you the bad guy? Well, I know you’re doing the same thing. You know how much I wanted to believe in you and how much I trusted you. You made me hate you. Yes, I can forgive you but I can’t forget everything and trust you again.

Did you ever love me or was everything a lie? I got lots of questions but none of ‘em were answered by you. Yes, you were my first but definitely not my last. Strangers; that’s what we’re better off.

RIP to the girl you used to see. Everything’s over now. This is the last time.

Here’s to the ones who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning and be disappointed. The ones who made it through that bitter break up,dried your own tears, and moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. Those of you who cried on the first day you talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The ones who listened to him say, I only want to be your friend, one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves and misses you. We deserve something, and this is our tribute.

Here’s to the ones that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change. We listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, and even snuck around to see him for while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, and ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us.

Here’s to the ones who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days. Here’s for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn’t possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to SETTLE for someone who didn’t treat us the way we should be treated.

Here’s for the ones who did their hair and make up and put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn’t see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn’t believe that he could do this to us again. This is for those great girls, who loved him more than words can say, and took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn’t bear to look back on their lives one day and wonder “what if”.

This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with.

Here’s to the girls who couldn’t cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt. The ones who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again.

This is for the ones who couldn’t bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an “I told you so.” The ones that could just TELL that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts, and their dreams again. We knew that we deserved better the entire time, that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that.

Here’s for the ones that FINALLY realized that he never gave a crap about them.Here’s for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, and the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment.Here’s for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better.

This is for those confusing days, when you miss him, and want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong, and remember that relationships are like broken glass, sometimes it’s better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together and get hurt. Remember the times you cried, and how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When “your song” comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made and tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don’t answer the door. Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation and the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the crap he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night, and how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn’t him, and realized that once again, he hadn’t called when he said he was going to.

One day, you’ll find a guy who’s worth all the tears, but he won’t make you cry. You may think that you’ll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It’s gonna hurt like crap, and it’s going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal.

I walked through the door with you
Air was cold, but something ‘bout it felt like home somehow and I
Left my scarf there at your sister’s house
And you still got it in your drawer even now

Oh your sweet disposition
And my wide eyed gaze
We’re singing in a car getting lost upstate
The Autumn leaves falling down like pieces in their place
And I can picture it after all these days
And I know it’s long gone, and that magic´s not here no more
And it might be okay, but I’m not fine at all

Cause here we are again on that little town street
You almost ran the red cause you were looking over me
Wind in my hair I was there I remember it all too well

Photo album on my counter
Your cheeks were turning red
You used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin size bed
And your mother’s telling stories ‘bout you on the t-ball team
You tell me about your past thinking your future was me

And I know it’s long gone, and there was nothing else I could do
And I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to

Cause here we are again in the middle of the night
We’re dancing round the kitchen in the refrigerator light
Down the stairs I was there I remember it all too well

And maybe we got lost in translation
Maybe I asked for too much
But maybe this thing was a masterpiece
´til you tore it all up
Running scared, I was there I remember it all too well

Hey you called me up again just to break me like a promise
So casually cruel in the name of being honest
I’m a crumbled up piece of paper lying here
Cause I remember it all all all too well

Time won’t fly it’s like I’m paralyzed by it
I´d like to be my old self again
But I’m still trying to find it
After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own
Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone
But you keep my old scarf from that very first week
Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me
You can’t get rid of it, cause you remember it all too well yeah

Cause there we are again when I loved you so
Back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

Wind in my hair you were there you remember it all
Down the stairs you were there you remember it all
It was rare, I was there I remember it all too well

I hate you for making me feel so uncertain about so many things that I did not use to question. I hate you for making me assume so many unrealistically wonderful thoughts about us. I hate you for making me set Utopian expectations about tomorrow. I hate you for teaching me that the greatest potential for joy has the greatest potential for pain. I hate you for letting me suffer without you knowing the torture that I have been undergoing just because of you. I hate you for giving me a blissful experience, and making me yearn for it. I hate you for unconsciously showing me my unknown weaknesses. I hate you for making me realize that my life—that I once thought is stable—is the exact opposite of stability. I hate you for making me lost—mentally pensive and deafeningly speechless—in the midst of a casual conversation. I hate you for making every vital part of me drastically weak.

I hate you for keeping me worried about you even if you seem to disregard my presence. I hate you for magnifying my need to be loved without actually loving me. I hate you for making me emotionally connected with you, without fully realizing it immediately, without preparing for something I did not expect, without enough energy for avoiding the undeniable truth. I hate you for fearing the endless possibilities if we spend the rest of our lives together. I hate you for hindering the chance of feeling love in its truest sense. I hate you for not giving me the assurance that you love me back. I hate you for making me feel a strong but one-directional feeling. I hate you for making me realize that life is unfair.

I hate you for making me feel this weird hatred that I could not hurt you. I hate you for making me weak, helpless and stupid. I hate you because I can do nothing but read your bewildering gestures and unspoken thoughts. I hate you for being indirectly coward about what you really feel and letting me think that we were still together.  And most of all, I hate you for not answering why…